Neo-politics

So, as I sat here this evening, watching my cat defend his favorite napping spot against invisible tribbles, I thought about politics.

Now, this isn't a political blog. I hate politics even more than I hate McDonald's food. But politics are on a lot of minds, right now. So I think about them.

There seem to be two main sides in most American politics: Democrats and Republicans. I've given a great deal of thought into the differences.

A Democrat is a Republican who wears pinstripe suits and believes in welfare.

A republican is a Democrat with shorter, darker hair who receives campaign donations from oil companies.

Both sides make my teeth itch.

I'm a registered podophile, and I've recently found a podcast which I enjoy listening to. It's called The Rush Limbaugh Lie of the Day. The podcaster is a rabid liberal democrat. That means that he believes everything that every democratic candidate says and wants all conservatives dead. There's a lot he says that I agree with, but there's a lot that I don't agree with. That's alright... he doesn't mind people disagreeing with him.

But the reason I like it... It's not that I can side with the Democrats. As I said, both sides make my teeth itch. But Rush Limbaugh... I hate that guy. I can't stand him. Even my cat wants him dead, and my cat is a virtual fount of love and happy wishes.

Of course, if I had to pick a side, I would pick Obama.

No, hear me out!

I don't know him... I don't know the issues, really... I know he has made some good promises, and that some of those good promises scare people who wouldn't benefit from them, but that's normal. What I do know is... He's black.

No, really, hear me out!!!

He's black. Ish. That is, I'm told he's mixed, but I guess that just means that he really is an American. But he's still black. Now, I don't consider myself a racist, so standing on its own, the fact that he has dark skin isn't an issue. The important additional detail is that my mother would die.

She always told me when I was growing up that the Bible says that if the US ever elected a black president, the world would come to an end. She honestly believed that. It should be obvious at this point that she never actually opened a Bible, but that didn't sway her... ummm... faith. Anyway, she's very, very hardcore set against a non-white man, or any kind of woman, being elected. During Kathy Whitmire's term as mayor of Houston, my mother cried almost daily, and still complains about the effects, decades later.

So if Obama is elected president, she'll just die. Maybe literally. I want him elected, so that I can call her and ask her opinion. It'll be fun.